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ou[email protected] Anderson, a sociologist at the University of Winchester, is the author of “The Monogamy Gap: Men, Love, and the Reality of Cheating.” His Web site is Valentine’s Day excitement is upon us, a time when people’s thoughts turn to romance, flowers, candle-lit dinners — and cheating?

Within two years, almost all of my subjects had cheated.

Worse, buying into this myth makes the wronged individuals blame themselves for their partner’s infidelity.

For most people, monogamy does not necessarily provide a lifetime of sexual contentment.

(Whether they cheat for sexual or emotional reasons remains unclear.) 3We generally agree on what counts as cheating.